Subconscious Addictions

Have you ever had one of those sudden realizations that you were addicted to something? And worse, an addiction to something that you would have never thought of as dangerous, were it not for your impetuous recognition of it?

This happened to me today. I was at the market getting a couple of things to eat. When I walked in, I had no intention of buying anything other than food. Soon thereafter, I found myself walking down the pet food aisle and picking up a couple of random treats for my dogs, Leo and Petey; dog treats, however, are not the addiction I'm talking about (though I'd be happy with that one). My "fix" was in the next aisle over... household cleaners.

Allow me to illustrate:



I snapped this picture with my iPhone once I had unloaded my cart onto the checkout conveyor belt. You may notice the usual suspects: sushi, a Styrofoam takeout box (filled with a delicious panini sandwich), things of that nature. But if you focus in on the upper-left hand area of the belt, you'll notice a couple of other items. The first: Tide Total Care detergent, which helps you reveal the ~seven signs of beautiful clothes~ and what not. The second: Purex Complete 3-in-One laundry sheets. Cooincidence? No.

I'm a uber-consumer at best, a buy-anything-I-see advertising whore at worse. Either way, I believe I've managed to snatch up every single "new" household cleaning product in the last five or so years, and my purchase usually happens after seeing a TV commercial for said product. The newest Swiffer invention? Check. Mr. Clean's latest innovation? Of course. Every single air freshener known to man? Yes, I've bought it.

I suppose this wouldn't be so much of a problem if I had actually used any of the aforementioned products at some point. But no, I buy them and then throw them into the cleaning closet, forgetting about them as they await their inevitable trip to the Island of Misfit Toilet Bowl Cleansers. I say to myself that I'll want them one day, someday; that I'll have a couple of hours to spare and an itch to scrub and that I'll use all of these products in some grand orgy of cleansing; alas, I know that day will (most likely, God willing) never come.

Until then, I sure as hell could use to get rid of a detergent container... or eight. Any takers?